#PizzaGate Scandal Leaves Rap Fans Hangry
On Sunday afternoon, NBA officials decided that the Raptors have won too many consecutive games and that fans have ate way too much free pizza. In what was another incredible match-up, the Toronto Raptors have officially ended their franchise record tying 11 game win streak and pizza feeding frenzy to OKC. This has left many members of Rap's nation distraught and hungry for not only historic success but for free pepperoni or cheese slices, redeemable at any Pizza Pizza location with proof of ticket purchase.
To pull this stunt, they must not be aware of the consequences when you mess with hangry, belligerent, pizza lovers of Toronto.
Like myself, I know most Raptor fans are quick to pull the trigger on NBA commissioner Adam Silver and his officials. Then again, credible sources from Brown Bagging Media say this controversial game may come from all the way up top with Pizza Pizza CEO Paul Goddard. Advanced statistics will show you an alarming stat that may prove this game did not fit the agenda of the on-going conspiracy theory #NBAHatesCanada.
Firstly, Toronto has an average home attendance of 19, 834 fans. Secondly, the Raptors own the best home record in the NBA at 29-6. Now, assuming that all 19, 834 fans took advantage of a free $3 slice for the last 27 (2 wins were less than 100 pts) home wins like they're entitled to, that would equate to an outrageous 1.6 m of free pizza this year and the possibility of $59, 502 of free pizza a game. A price Paul Goddard may no longer be willing to pay and has now sparked the #PizzaGate scandal. Not to be confused with the former #PizzaGate Scandal involving high-ranking Democratic party members allegedly operating a child prostitution ring out of Comet Ping Pong Pizzeria.
Although, Toronto did plenty on their own to lose this one, with 19 turnovers to OKC and 28 points scored off of them, the Raptors may have been their own worst enemy on Sunday. Russel Westbrook completely torched the Raps with his 5th straight triple double, marking his third career streak of 5 consecutive triple doubles. He also led his team in points, rebounds and assists for the 33rd time, now tying Wilt Chamberlain with that feat. Of course, these kind of accolades are never done alone and Russ did receive some assistance from officials.
But that was only the start. After Lowry fouled out, the game went off the rails with 3 ejections in the last 10 seconds, including Coach Casey, who may have had to pay reparations for a rambunctious fan sitting right behind him.
As Matty D points out in the video above, he believes it was a fan sitting right behind Casey who expressed his dislike to the refs. Now, a closer screen shot may discover who that boisterous fan may have been sitting in Drake's seats.
Well, it's bakaaaaa the no long talkaaa! At 1:38 in the video you can see Baka tug on his boy's shirt with a guilty look on his face with "Yo I think that was me" written all over it.
In Mark Davis's defense, Baka and Casey share the same pipes with a deep, coarse voice. However, the fans at the ACC weren't as forgiving and the officials required a security escort out the arena led by Dog the Bounty Hunter's son, Leland Chapman.
Unlike every other NBA team, this loss hasn't altered much in Rap's nation and Toronto remains comfortably in first place- the silver lining. But officials may want to be a little more focused next time they arrive in the 6ix because even Dog and the rest of the gang won't be able to save your neck if this kind of officiating happens again.
